I think it is natural on any journey to have very positive phases, followed by the not so positive phases in order to grow and reach your goals. If things are too easy, then the danger of complacency settling is in high; if there is no challenge in the end goal then there is nothing to motivate you along the way.
But, what happens if you become disillusioned by the journey?
I have written extensively about our early retirement goals, the number required, the Ultimate Dream Fund updates and how I organise our finances to ensure that I know exactly where our money is going. But, in all honesty, I am having a bit of a wobble at the moment about our journey. It is so hard to stay positive about it all when doubt sets in, that you begin to doubt whether it’s possible. Sure, other people have managed, but can we? I have become a bit disillusioned with our efforts, as I feel constantly that they’re not good enough.
I get these ups and downs quite regularly when it comes to our finances; on some occasions I look at where we stand and think “Okay, so it’s not ideal but we’re doing okay. More than okay!” and then other times I think “Urgh, we’ve got so far to go. We’re so far behind our goals. Can we even do this?” and I think that’s natural to do so. There are always people out there who are doing better than us, who earn more than us, who save more than us.
So, as I need to stay motivated for the long haul, I remind myself of these things when I’m disillusioned by the journey.
Why we’re doing this.
It sounds simple, but when I’m feeling down about how far we’ve still got to go, I remind myself of why we’re doing this in the first place. The driving force behind our early retirement dream is so that we can spend time with those we love, our families. Nothing is more important to us.
What it means.
Early retirement means that all of our time is ours. We are free to do what we want, when we please. There are many places we want to travel to, to visit and explore. I would like to do some volunteering, perhaps with the Dogs Trust. I want to have more time to learn how to do things, including gardening and growing our own veg. There is a price on freedom, so it seems.
We made a commitment.
It sounds daft, but we made a commitment to this journey. We made a commitment to the end result, and the journey to get there. Most people struggle to continue along the same path for a long time, never mind the next twenty years. It’s almost like I have something to prove, to say that we did it!
We want a more simple life.
In order to save so much for our early retirement, it means that we don’t buy as much stuff as other people perhaps do. We don’t go shopping on a weekend nor do we buy a lot of things. We are happy to buy second hand when we do, plus we shop in the sales often. But, by not chasing material possessions and the latest trends, it means our life is more simple. We get joy out of the little things, like homemade cake and a cup of tea. Hearing our boy laugh when he’s having fun playing. Seeing him explore the world around him and be fascinated with things (his current favourite is a cardboard box!) that are new and exciting.
There are so many positives to the journey we are on, but because it is such a long journey, it is easy to become disillusioned along the way. When the going gets tough, I need to remind myself of these things to get me through.
What do you find tough? What are your tips on getting through the tough times?
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hi Nicola, I think you’re doing brilliantly – it does seem that you are going through a slowdown with the savings at the moment but my impression was that’s very much because you are on maternity leave and so is temporary, surely? … You offer encouragement to so many other people that I think you should be proud – I’m absolutely certain that you can achieve your goals.
Nicola, this is a very positive inspirational post. Life takes you sometimes up or down, and there are really challenges along the way. I think one important thing to do is to learn from every challenge you encounter and make sure you keep progress.
This is EXACTLY how I feel most of the time. I waffle between “heck yeah, we’re doing awesome!” to “this isn’t working at all!” Most of the problem stems from a house we moved out of two years ago but still own because no one will buy it. It’s got a lot of problems and we’ve sunk tens of thousands of dollars into it over the past few years. We don’t make much ($75k together), and it seems like no matter how much we save, we get a phone call every few months requiring us to spend another few hundred or thousand on a repair. It’s like, take one step forward and get knocked three steps back. I still haven’t found a good way to deal with it. :/
Short sale it or may be look i nto it being sold as a HUD hpuse or some type of low income sale. If it gets you out from under owning it I’ll be worth it because it sounds like at times its a thorn in your side! Lol Good luck, love your blog and wish you well! As I’m browsing through reading ypu offer several great blogs with excellent advice! Thanks for sharing your life with the world.
As you said, every journey has its ups and downs. Hopefully your current state is only momentary. What I find tough is when several unexpected expenses crop up all at the same time. It feels a bit like life doesn’t want you to reach your goals, but really it’s just a random occurrence and this is what you plan for. If I look at the bigger picture, perhaps that year instead of just that month or week, I find it’s easier to recognize my progress and just keep moving forward.
What an honest and recognisable story, No matter what you goals in life are, I think you will be discouraged from time to time or doubt the reasons why you started your journey in the first place. It’s only natural, and I think it also serves a purpose. It enables to to reconsider the direction you’re heading, good for you for coming to the conclusion that your goals are still worth it!
My biggest tip would be to not be too hard on yourself, and also see how far you’ve already come.
I’m pretty naturally skeptical, so I doubt the journey all the time, driving myself, my friends, family, and loved ones insane. When it comes to early retirement, for example, I frequently think about how much I love my job, and the fact that, as people seem to keep reminding me, old age isn’t guaranteed, so won’t I regret not “living it up” now?
In the same vein, I frequently feel like I’m not making “enough” progress. What does “enough” even mean, and by whose standards? I think having a blog or a tracking system helps, because you can visualize how far you’ve come from where you’ve started.
When that doesn’t work, there’s always wine 😉
So been there! Heck, I still am. FI is likely going to come at a traditional age for us because of math, but we’re saving for a house. It’s taking longer than we would have liked, and keeping the end goal at the forefront is so key. And remembering why it’s a goal at all. Great post.
My biggest financial goal right now is to get back on track with buying a home where we’re currently renting and selling our old house. When that’s out of the way, I feel like I can move forwards with other goals like investing and planning for retirement (not even early retirement)! I often feel like my plans are put on hold because of obstacles, in this case the old house. Just try to take it one day at a time and save as much as I can in the meantime! I also try to not to compare my financial results with what I deem others to be doing. Any progress is good! I hope you feel encouraged again soon – and that you can enjoy simple pleasures whilst you’re on the long journey. 🙂
For me, when I’m feeling worn out with it all I break the task right down into something very small and achievable. This might be sticking to a certain budget for something or having x many days without using the car. Then when I’m feeling more motivated and energetic I can tackle the big stuff again. We’re all in it for the long-haul so it’s completely normal for energy to fluctuate.
I think you’re doing brilliantly!
Thank you 🙂 I like breaking down tasks into manageable chunks 🙂